Home

Home is something I’ve been thinking about lately. For one, I miss it and the people that make it what it is, especially this time of year. And since being married, I have two families that I sorely miss. For two, we don’t really have one in the literal sense of the word. We haven’t really had a home since the end of July. But by the grace of God, we have had the opportunity to notice and be blessed by the homes of other people who have deeply loved and cared for us. This is a profound blessing I would have never been able to experience otherwise. There’s some serious reflection, praying, and self work to be done when you don’t have a home. You’re never quite comfortable…and yet at times I’ve grown to like that about our lives. I think God has been showing us the uniqueness and faithfulness of His character that longs to give and bless and heal. And I’m grateful. 

I think in the human heart there is always a deeper longing for home. It helps us feel whole. This time of year I’m reminded of the wholeness we have in the hope of a Savior who wasn’t born in a comfortable place. Joseph and the very mother of the Redeemer of the world frantically search for a place for him to be born. During the chaos, the unsettling, the lack-of-plans is WHERE HE COMES. I’m realizing now that there is spiritual cushioning I experienced in the states, where all was generally well if I was in my home. I could relax easily and be very contented. My family and dearest friends were only a phone call or couple of hours away. Here, my personal contentment has no choice but to come from within my very being from the Spirit. Or it doesn’t come at all. My carefully laid out plans and places of comfort aren’t here to make me feel better or distract me from the holy details of this life. I have to take notice. There’s so much need to take notice of here. I have felt the Spirit’s presence in new and powerful ways. I have felt the movement and action of people's prayers from across miles, bringing us His peace that passes understanding in times that are frustrating and hard. Author Frederick Buechner from his book Telling Truth puts it this way:

I believe that it is when that power is alive in me and through me that I come closest to being truly home, come closest to finding or being found by that holiness that I may have glimpsed in the charity and justice and order and peace of other homes I have known, but that in its fullness was always missing. I cannot claim that I have found the home I long for every day of my life, not by a long shot, but I believe that in my heart I have found, and have maybe always known, the way that leads to it. I believe that Buttrick was right and that the home we long for and belong to is finally where Christ is. I believe that home is Christ's kingdom, which exists both within us and among us as we wend our prodigal ways through the world in search of it.

What’s great about this season is the reminder and Truth that Jesus himself is the Prince of Peace, the very peace we all long and hope for during the whole of our lives. This is the season of his coming. Psalm 90:1 says, "Lord, YOU have been our dwelling place." I can confidently say that I have never known the weight of what this verse means until now. Of course, I have come near to God in prayer and seen his faithful workings for years, but I have never known the depth of what it's like to only have Him and the clothes in our bags. The Lord alone IS our REFUGE and strength. Refuge is not merely having a place to be and rest after a long day's work or internship. Ruminating on what home means, reminds me of college days and the sweet friends who sang with me there and those who made King College what it was. Abbie, Cassie, and I always liked trying to sing three-part harmonies together, mostly songs from the Wailin' Jennys. One of our favorites we sang together was called, "Heaven When We're Home" and I'll provide the link underneath the lyrics if you're interested in listening. Please disregard our banter at the beginning of the recording. My favorite part of it was always the chorus:

It's a long and rugged road

And we don't know where it's headed

But we know it's going to get us where we're going

And when we find what we're looking for

We'll drop these bags and search no more

It's going to feel like heaven when we're home

https://www.dropbox.com/s/336n20oaveu5huw/14%20Heaven%20When%20We%27re%20Home.m4a?dl=0

It's true. We have no idea where we are headed, but we have the hope that he is forever with us. And, ultimately, heaven is the home we are longing for in the end. We have no idea where we'll live in Kimana, yet month to month we have found the place where we can settle in and take each day at a time. This has urged me to think more intentionally of those who experience their own uprootedness this season and beyond, at far greater sacrifice, and/or those who have lost someone significant in their lives. Dear friends, I have to thank you for the fact that I am experiencing this unsettling. And I genuinely thank you. Because of it, I have done a greater amount of both wrestling with and resting in who God says he is. We can believe what he promises. I am thanking him for the small things this month like the ability to get a hot shower, snuggle and read on the couch, and am using this time and season to thank Him for his goodness and mercy to us, those same things that he offers to the people of the world in his coming.

Isaiah 9:6 "For to us a child is born, to us a son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders. And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace."